Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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