Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
