you guys were way drunker than both of me
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
