You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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