is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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