if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
