zippers are such a cool invention
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
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