White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
