I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
