I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize
