At least make sure they are 18
Why
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
