my phone cant type all the emotion im having
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
