My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
