He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize