Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
