Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
