i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
