She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
