Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
