Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
