I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Every concussion has its silver lining
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Help me help you realize you are a moron
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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