they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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