hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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