Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize