So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
