As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
