There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize
