fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Randomize
