p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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