she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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