fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
