I don't remember. Are we still dating?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Randomize
