i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Randomize
