good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
