FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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