Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Randomize
