i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
