Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I CAN MOONWALK!
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Randomize
