i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
