do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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