All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
