Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Randomize
