you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
Randomize
