I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize
