Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
