If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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