These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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