remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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