If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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