I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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