he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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